We Are Finished...I Think

[jfmiller]

This terrible experience started over 1 yr ago..long story short a job loss by myself 6/07, servicer HOmeq no help offered when we contacted right away. Homeq didnt offer a modification till 3/08, we refused its was not affordable, then we asked for another mod, and told the same lousey terms and a payment of over 4K a month for 5 years. Needless to say we refused again, then I got back to work spoke to Homeq again about a more reasonable deal to no avail..Well now my husband just got laid off. I found in my same neighborhood a rental that i can pay myself until my husband gets back to work, in the meantime im not sure whether we should let HOmeq know about my husbands layoff and offer them a DIL, or just let them home foreclose and declare chapter 7, which we would qualify for with just the one income for now. We live in New York State and we do not want to be penalized with a deficency judgement, if we can avoid it.... filing BK will be worth it for the fresh start elsewhere. Its is a shame that the money powers that be got a bailout and there is none for the rest of us. We tried to fight, and got a legal aid attorney to look things over but it didnt seem to help, we tried HopeNow, Acorn, Neighborhood Works, NACA, and none of them were any help. We are good people that wanted to keep our home but in the end its just wood and stone and we will deal with the consequences of BK, and learn to live by cash...I have one credit card i will keep for emergencies.

[cactus77727]

I'm sure you are still good people. We are just good people, stuck in a bad situation.

[oregonheaven]

Of course you are good people. I think most people here are very good people. No one woke up one day and decided being a homeowner wasn't for them. The bottom line is that even the most brilliant minds in finance got this one wrong, or at least looked the other way enough times. History is full of asset bubbles and the terrible lessons they teach. Unfortunately, some of us will fall victim to this one. That is not to say we don't bear responsibility. I think many of us (myself included) took on too much risk, and didn't plan well enough for a rainy day. That is surely my lesson to take away. I never thought half the things that have happened in the last six months were even possible in my lifetime. But those are the cards we were dealt, and we just all try to learn from it, move forward, ask forgiveness of others, and offer forgiveness without conditions. You are not a bad person, and you will make it through this. God bless......

[jfmiller]

Thanks for this forum and the encouragement, its been a long hard lesson. We have just recently found a home for rent in our neighborhood very affordable, so if one of us lost our jobs it could still be affordable, we would not have to change our kids from school and we would have all of our same neighbors and friends. The pressure will be off, we have been on this roller coaster for 18 months and we are ready to get off. I have consulted a BK attorney and we do qualify for chapter 7 so while our credit will get the impact, better the impact on that than our peace of mind. I just want the calls to stop, I never want to hear the name Homeq or Wells Fargo again, and to go out and not be nervous of coming home and finding a sheriff notice on the door at any moment. I think god is leading us in the right direction. The media and other analyst say that we all should known what we were getting into, but the so called professionals should not have convinced us it was possible, and they got the bailouts and we get nothing. But we are all good people that got duped but we will all come out better for this. I will never be taken advantage of again. I have learned to read fine print and if i cant understand something get it to someone that does. I feel we are going to have a fresh start even though it wont be as homeowners we still have our families. God Bless everyone here, and Moe this site has been INVALUABLE. I have been getting info from this forum for over a year. Just because my case didn't work out, doesn't mean someones else's will not. Exhaust every possibility before letting go. We tried very hard. Our motto for 2009 is "Keep it Moving"...Happy New Year to all here....

[The Professor]

jfmiller said, "Exhaust every possibility before letting go." Having been involved over the years with people of tried this approach only to have it lead to heartache and financial disaster, I would respectfully disagree. The key, in my humble opinion, is to early on adopt a practical approach to resolving your situation. Too many of you have struggled too hard, borrowing on things like your retirement funds, in an effort to keep your financial ship afloat. The simple truth is "income less outgo determines outcome."

Daniel

[jfmiller]

When i said exhaust every possibility in no way did i mean finances. What i meant was to exhaust all the available help, and different programs. Although we tried several programs and they didnt work out for us, i dont want anyone discouraged. Everyones situation is unique and what didnt work for us may work for someone else. But i would definately not recommend exhausting finances, that would be a mistake.