Loan Modification Forum - LoanSafe.org - View Single Post - Cut to the CHASE

snapple candy · 07-03-2009, 08:30 AM

Hodgini,
I understand your plight, tax implications, and tweaking of dissomaster calculations. Honestly I have heard some of the same complaints from my ex. I chose to file myself, but only because of some pretty bad behavior on his part that he was unwilling to seek professional help for. I can admit I may have done something similiar in overestimating our house value, and had I not been so stubborn about the listing price, things may have turned out different. It is something I do regret because the circumstances that followed and that played out in the courts were pretty horrific and costs me over 200k, the depletion of my 401K, and severe trauma to me and my children at the hands of the courts and corrupt attorneys. The family law system is pretty broken and I can only see the system full of predators taking advantage of people in weak emotional positions and preying upon them. My ex is not a saint and surely made some decisions that have cost us both financial ruin. The family law system does not act in the best interest of children nor the family.
As much as I know you must resent the hell out of your ex, coming from the dark side myself (hehe) is to try to keep in perspective what is best for your children. I know that you are in the middle of losing everything and given very little to live on. This is very hard to accept. I tried to get my ex to move to a place where cost of living lower and where we both could not be so financially stretched and have a better quality of life. To try to work in a cooperative manner. Well, he didnt know the meaning of cooperative effort because he was so stuck in his anger and vindictivness, as wll as his addictions. He took us all down in the process.
I heard some divorced fathers talking on a talk show and one made a comment I will never forget. He said it comes down to loving your children more than you hate your ex-wife. I know these attorneys dont have our childrens best interest at heart..only their pocket book. I have been in litigation now for almost 10 years and going back in a few weeks. I wish it wasnt this way. I would prefer to move past this and move on with my life. My ex just wont let go and wants to stay engaged in these battles.

All I can suggest is to start looking for a decent place to live at low $$$ now...yeah like you have time. It is hard to keep 2 households going like this. I hope you can find a place you can call home that you can live with and this is not next to crack dealers. Maybe finding another single parent dad to share a place with? Good luck.

07-03-2009, 08:30 AM	#12 (permalink)
snapple candy Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 1,310 Nominated 0 Times in 0 Posts TOTW/F/M Award(s): 0	Re: Cut to the CHASE - Jumbo & 2nd Mod Hodgini, I understand your plight, tax implications, and tweaking of dissomaster calculations. Honestly I have heard some of the same complaints from my ex. I chose to file myself, but only because of some pretty bad behavior on his part that he was unwilling to seek professional help for. I can admit I may have done something similiar in overestimating our house value, and had I not been so stubborn about the listing price, things may have turned out different. It is something I do regret because the circumstances that followed and that played out in the courts were pretty horrific and costs me over 200k, the depletion of my 401K, and severe trauma to me and my children at the hands of the courts and corrupt attorneys. The family law system is pretty broken and I can only see the system full of predators taking advantage of people in weak emotional positions and preying upon them. My ex is not a saint and surely made some decisions that have cost us both financial ruin. The family law system does not act in the best interest of children nor the family. As much as I know you must resent the hell out of your ex, coming from the dark side myself (hehe) is to try to keep in perspective what is best for your children. I know that you are in the middle of losing everything and given very little to live on. This is very hard to accept. I tried to get my ex to move to a place where cost of living lower and where we both could not be so financially stretched and have a better quality of life. To try to work in a cooperative manner. Well, he didnt know the meaning of cooperative effort because he was so stuck in his anger and vindictivness, as wll as his addictions. He took us all down in the process. I heard some divorced fathers talking on a talk show and one made a comment I will never forget. He said it comes down to loving your children more than you hate your ex-wife. I know these attorneys dont have our childrens best interest at heart..only their pocket book. I have been in litigation now for almost 10 years and going back in a few weeks. I wish it wasnt this way. I would prefer to move past this and move on with my life. My ex just wont let go and wants to stay engaged in these battles. All I can suggest is to start looking for a decent place to live at low $$$ now...yeah like you have time. It is hard to keep 2 households going like this. I hope you can find a place you can call home that you can live with and this is not next to crack dealers. Maybe finding another single parent dad to share a place with? Good luck.